Ogden Nash tells it like this: “There are two kinds of people who blow through life like a breeze, And one kind is gossipers, and the other kind is gossipees.” He continues, “Another good thing about gossip is that it is within everybody’s reach, And it is much more interesting than any other form of speech.”
We have all experienced this “form of speech” either in a private or public setting whereby we indulge ourselves in adding to the discussion or, as in private, we give our opinions freely, but not within earshot of a crowd. Come on now, you know you have done this, after all, I was told this by a reliable source who insists on remaining anonymous because of fallout regarding a good friend, who just happens to be spending the weekend at the house. You know the one, remember from last week, who told me, told you also and you knew it to be true, as when you mentioned it to your friends, they verified it since they heard about it from relatives who were visiting from out of state who just happened to overhear a conversation and deemed it to be true, since the source who relayed this to them has always been reliable, except for maybe that one time, you remember the one, remember………………………..OK….so, you do remember…well, that was only one time. Give them a break…they were just given wrong information.
What do you mean check?
Why would you want to do that? Waste of time and energy.
Did you hear about? Well, let me tell you what happened? No, I found it hard to believe also, but it must be true; after all, look who is talking and you know that he would not give our false information just to be talking…………………..
How many times has gossip ruined a friendship in your life? How many times has someone at work been offended for no reason? How many times have individuals been fired for no reason other than the fact that since something was said so many times, it must be true?
Inuendo vs truth!
What’s that all about?
We love conversation don’t we, oh, I am sorry, JUICY conversation – the more the better. We say we will not listen, but we do. We say we will not spread it around, but we do. We say it is wrong but we continue to spread venom in a premeditated way and then we try to look as innocent as a new born babe when confronted – WHO ME – You have got to be kidding? NO! Really! How did that happen?
So just exactly what is the rule regarding polite conversation? First of all, is it useful? Is it true? Does it need to be repeated? Will it hurt someone? Is it malicious to the point of ruining an individual’s standing either at work, home, or in a family setting?
How many people have you deliberately hurt by repeating something you heard, never checking, but perking up your ears as if to say, “Give me more ?”
Private discussions among friends one on one to discover the truth to my way of thinking is not gossip but fact finding and there is a limit to this discussion, which is not to be repeated. If someone has done something wrong in your eyes, confront them head on. If someone has misused your trust, face them head on. If someone is in serious danger of causing harm, either to himself or to another person, it must be addressed head on.
Don’t you just love this saying: “Oh, I could never tell them that. They would not like me anymore. They are my friends and I would not want to hurt them.” Yet, they are spreading malicious gossip for the sake of gossip and the fallout has just begun – sometimes ruining friendships for a lifetime. So tell me, what is your definition of a friend?
Proverbs 11:12-13. Whoever belittles another lacks sense, but an intelligent person remains silent. A gossip goes about telling secrets, but one who is trustworthy in spirit keeps a confidence.
Have you been trustworthy today?
Now, that really is a discussion for another day.
Blessings.